An Afternoon Spent with Van Gogh’s Art Evokes Decision to Publish

I’m a fan of Vincent Van Gogh’s artwork and never miss an opportunity to view his paintings and sketches. A recent visit to an immersive exhibit in New Orleans does not disappoint. Hundreds of digitally-displayed paintings invite Van Gogh fans to step into his world. And embrace the colors and movements of his brush strokes, with musical accompaniment.

Though everything about Van Gogh explodes during this event, his words burst as powerfully as his sunflowers, irises, and The Starry Night. From the grave, this 19th-century Post-Impressionist gut punches me. 

“What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?”

While I read the words ‘courage to attempt,’ my mind hears ‘courage to complete.’ I’m standing at the edge of a publication cliff: The Phantom Wife, my paranormal debut novel set in New Orleans and along Mississippi’s Gulf Coast is buffed, polished, and ready for release. But to protect my work, I’ve spent the past year vetting agents in person, by phone, or on Zoom, determined to unveil the truth about traditional publishing, post-Pandemic. 

As is often the case, the truth is not pretty. On average, one to two years separate the moment an agent signs an author with the novel’s publication date. A lot takes place during this time, including a required edit to meet market demand. An author also releases her publication rights, including some versions of e-book, paperback, and hardcover rights, as well as film, audio, and even 50 percent of world rights (which covers publication outside of the US). Yes, there’s a disbursement of royalties, but the percentage is meager unless you’re a #1 New York Times bestseller.

 “One must work and dare if one really wants to live.”

A barrel of fear hovers at the end of a manuscript’s journey. It’s the fear that what I’ve written will be copacetic. So, my inner dialogue loops – will it entertain readers who live on the opposite side of the world – those unfamiliar with Southern culture? Will it strengthen readers’ beliefs regarding our connections to the spirit world, offer reassurance that we are never alone? Most importantly, will it encourage readers to embrace their most authentic lives, discarding the expectations of others? It’s a risk I’m willing to take because, at its heart, The Phantom Wife is a story about the eternal power of a family’s love.

Thank you, Van Gogh, for the magnitude of your art and the power of your words. Soon, I’ll attend an indie publishing conference and gather with inkers like me, for it’s within the arena of creatives that courage is collectively uplifted. So, I leave you with these thoughts as I dare to publish my novel. On my own terms.

• Publish —independently— and DO NOT spend a year (or two) querying, only to learn that your agent mandates a manuscript overhaul to please ONE publisher. Understand there are no guarantees any publisher will bite and offer a book deal.

• Accept that traditional publication requires that you relinquish the rights to your work. You’ve no control and a small percentage of royalties in the end.

• Capture the fear of adverse reactions or total rejections in a mental birdcage, then delete it. You are in the wrong business if you’re writing to impress a group of friends or fear backlash from family members. Three voices tell the story of The Phantom Wife across dual timelines. Within its pages, a reluctant enchantress, an angel, and a family line of trapped ghosts reveal a tale of murder and deceit. Saucy interactions await too.

• Allow yourself to fulfill a dream. Then dream even bolder the next time.